On the “In Between”


“Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

(Phil 4:6-7)

This probably isn’t a surprise to those who know me, but I don’t believe in coincidences. Honestly, I believe more in Divine intervention. However, I also lack patience at times. I have suffered from anxiety and depression most of my adult life. In the moments that I should be celebrating, I am anxious of what will mess it up. In the hard times, I’m anxious to get out of the hardship. I have found that this is a typical dilemma for many young catholics. We try to focus on Christ and His messages to us, but we often fall short in remembering what trust and patience truly means.

At Mass this past weekend, we found the Apostles in a similar mind space – they are situated in between events. After Jesus’s Ascension, the Apostles and the Virgin Mary gathered together in the upper room to pray. They have been through many different sets of emotions and life events since Jesus was Crucified and then Resurrected. They lose Jesus, then he resurrected from the dead, after which He begins to show Himself in different ways and places. Imagine the waiting and anxiety they must’ve felt. Then Christ leaves them again, for good, so they go to the same location where Jesus celebrated the Last Supper. In those nine days between the Ascension and Pentecost, which is where the term novena comes from, they pray. Yes, there are other orders of business they take care of, like replacing Judas, but still…they pray and they wait. They had no other choice. In a time of in between when they could be fretting and worrying about the promised coming of the Holy Spirit, they practice patience by waiting in prayer, preparing for their task of spreading the Good News throughout the world. As I was listening to the message in this past weekend’s readings, I imagined what I would have done. I tried to put myself in their place, thinking about that in between time. Then, I’m on Facebook and a friend posts something about biblical figures who had to wait to get what they needed and so on, all while I’m tossing this next blog around in my mind. It truly is Divine – God is working within me to get some things I’m stressing about focused. A reminder that I need to let go and let God. So, let’s consider those biblical figures that we’ve heard about our entire lives that have had to wait.

This is what the post said: 

Noah waited 120 years before the predicted rain arrived.

Abraham waited 25 years for a promised son.

Joseph waited 14 years in prison for a crime he didn’t commit.

I will add a few more…

David waited 14 years to become King of Israel.

Paul waited in prison for 2 years although not a criminal.

Elizabeth waited most of her life to become pregnant.

Now – I will say that I didn’t go back into Scripture to make sure the math was exactly correct because the point is the same. These people, who we see as holy, had to wait. They had to live in the anxiety that occurs within that “in between” time. They gave themself to God and fully trusted. They accepted their lot, lived their days with hope and trust, but definitely prayed. Now – I will say that I didn’t go back into Scripture to make sure the math was exactly correct because the point is the same. These people, who we see as holy, had to wait. They had to live in the anxiety that occurs within that “in between” time. They gave themself to God and fully trusted. They accepted their lot, lived their days with hope and trust, but definitely prayed.

However, being the linguist that I am, I needed to look up what in between is actually defined as. According to the Oxford Dictionary, in between has two meanings, as two different parts of speech:

  1. adjective: situated somewhere between two extremes or recognized categories; intermediate
  2. noun: an intermediate thing

The etymology of ‘between’ is similar – from the Middle English bitwene meaning “in the space which separates, midway, in the midst, among; by turns.” Being halfway to finishing a task or being intermediate is not terrible. Its connotation seems more positive than negative. Yet, in that space of “what’s next” creates anxiety and worry. We make in between negative. 

Therefore, I further tried to put myself in their shoes. I would like to say that I would pray and wait, but I’m fearful I would not be as faithful to that method. Like many people, I often worry about what is next. When something good happens to me, I struggle to fully enjoy it because I’m afraid of what will be coming down the road to ruin it. When something bad happens I worry about what else is going to happen. When life feels static, at a standstill, I worry about where I’m going. That anxiety must be what all of the above people felt at some point. Alas, as St. Catherine of Siena said, “And of what should we be afraid? Our captain on this battlefield is Christ Jesus.” The choice we need to make is between allowing that anxiety to cloud our minds or giving our full trust in Christ. Yet, anxiety is something that we are hearing more and more about, because we are trying to “stop the stigma” of mental health. According to the ADAA in a 2018 study, anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting forty million adults in the United States age eighteen and older, or 18.1% of the population every year. As I sat down to put my thoughts to pen, I was reminded of the aforementioned quote from the Bible (also Divine intervention, in my opinion): “Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” (Phil 4:6-7) 

The time in between events does not need to be scary or full of worry, if we believe, trust, and have hope. We have to go to God. Give Him everything we have weighing on us, “making our requests known.” On the other hand, we often forget when we pray that God doesn’t just give us everything we want. There is a difference between want and need, and only He knows what we need. Yet, when we begin to form that relationship with God through prayer, and come to Him with everything good and bad in our lives, we will feel that peace in hearts and our minds. We will begin to feel that the in between is not as bad as we make it.  “Cast all your anxieties on Him because he cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7